I Still Believe by Jeremy CampMy rating: 3 of 5 stars
Okay. I may as well just do this review, let everyone think I'm a heartless jerk, and then I can pass this book on to those waiting in the Hold line behind me at my local library.
Let me begin by saying, I heard a Jeremy Camp song for the first time just last year after I came home from being in the hospital for several months and it was truly a goose-bump moment. I could tell his music was anointed.
Secondly, I am well-acquainted with grief having lost all my immediate family members in a very short period of time.
Thirdly, I've been on a waiting list for 12 weeks from my library to get my turn to read this book. So I fully expected to love this book. But while I was waiting for my turn I read the Sample and didn't get much out of it. Then when it FINALLY was my turn, I discovered I was having some trouble getting into it. Curious.
This is the story of Jeremy's brief first marriage that ended when his wife died of cancer. It details this time in his life, his struggle with the grief and confusion, and his decision to continue his walk of faith with Jesus in spite of the fact that he didn't understand what God was doing or why Jesus would let his young, beautiful wife suffer and die. Considering the subject of the story and my own intimate knowledge of grief and how it relates to my faith in Jesus, I expected this to be a gut-wrenching read and was a bit apprehensive to stir those emotions in myself. I needn't have worried. I made almost no emotional connection to this story at all.
I've been trying to figure out why I can't get emotionally invested in Camp's story. We have a lot in common. Including growing up excessively poor. But I believe it comes down to two factors. I just don't connect with his perceptions and sensibilities and ... he's not a very good writer.
It seemed like it was being written by a preteen. So much so that I actually checked the copyright of the book to see how old Jeremy was when he wrote it. It was originally published in 2011 which puts him in his early thirties. I found several examples of his descriptive abilities in one area where he's telling us about he and Melissa declaring their love for each other and deciding to get married while she is quite ill having just undergone chemotherapy.
"She seemed pretty bummed out." ; "Her parents were super-stoked." and, "she thought the proposal would be all glamorous but instead she 'felt all sweaty and gross'" because apparently, she had been able to go outside for a run.
Plus, the part when they are discovering their love for each other in view of the uncertainty of their future together should have been deeply intense but it sounded more like discussing going to the school dance. "Does she like me? He liked her first. I wish I could have taken back that I told her I liked her." This is basically the height of the romantic dialogue you will get. Even the discussions of faith are so filled with Christianese clichés that most nonChristians will have no idea what he's talking about.
But how can that be, Laura-Lee? Jeremy Camp is a very successful Christian song-WRITER!
I have pondered that dilemma too. Let us examine Jeremy Camp's song, "Revive Me" which is based on Psalm 119.
Consider my affliction and please deliver me
Plead my cause and redeem me
Salvation is not for the wicked
For they don't seek your word
Great are your tender mercies, Lord
Revive me, according to your loving-kindness
Revive me, that I may seek your word
Revive me, according to your loving-kindness
Revive me, oh Lord
You give me understanding
According to your word
Great peace for those who seek your face
I long for salvation
My lips shall praise your name
I rejoice in the treasure of your keep
Revive me, according to your loving-kindness
Revive me, that I may seek your word
Revive me, according to your loving-kindness
Revive me, oh Lord
Basically, all those words belong to the original writer. King David. Camp has just shuffled them around so that they are in the position to rhyme appropriately for the music he wrote. Which is, I still believe, where Camp's actual talents are. But as a wordsmith, he just doesn't have it. And although I'm sure this time in his life was both heart-breaking and ultimately faith-inspiring, he should have left the telling of the story in prose to someone who has the ability to express and reveal Jeremy's broken heart and the road back to his renewed faith and restored relationship with Jesus. Not everyone is equipped with the ability to write a good book. Jeremy Camp is no exception. Give this book a skip and go listen to one of his songs and prepare to get goose-bumps ... Whenever he starts singing God's words directly from the Bible.
Thanks to all for reading this review (which must have been hard for all you Camp fans!)
Sincerely, Laura-Lee
UPDATE: All these weeks later and I can't get this review out of my mind. I feel like I've back-stabbed a family member, as indeed that may be exactly what I've done by criticizing Jeremy so harshly. I was listening to some of his music today and thinking how talented he is as a songwriter and how much he obviously loves his Saviour and felt I needed to say something more. However, as I reread my review of "I Still Believe" I find that I still believe what I said about it and am reluctant to change or delete it.
Let me end this by apologizing to Jeremy (and his fans) if I've hurt anyone's feelings and let you know that even before I read it, I had made a Purchase Suggestion for this book at my local library which they approved. So they added I Still Believe in ebook format to their catalog. Because even if in my opinion it's not my thing, I Still Believe it can be for others.
(Continually trying to speak) The truth with love, Laura-Lee
"Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit. Rather, in humility value others above yourselves," (Philippians 2:3)
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